I'm only pretending...

The other night my daughter was wailing... I walked in to see what was the matter.
"Are you OK, Clare?"

"Yes. I was only pretending. WAAA! WAAA! See?"

As I walked away, I shook my head and smiled at my wife. Over the last few days I have thought more about this and realized that this pretending skill is a skill that many people will use all through their lives. I work with people who "pretend" to get along although they don't like each other. I've known people who pretend to be devout Christians one minute and the next they engage in things that are completely contrary to the Faith. I know lots of people who are completely miserable, but pretend that they are happy and content with how things are going in their lives. Why do we pretend so much? Can we not really get along? Is the Faith that hard to live? Is the life that God has given us so bad?

Many people pretend for a lot of different reasons. Sometimes we need a reminder of the good that God has given us. I'm just as guilty of not being content as the next person. I've overlooked my blessings. I've tried to do things that God has asked me not to do. All that being said though - I also try to be me and not to pretend I'm something that I'm not. However, I don't try to be the me that I would settle into if I had nothing pushing me to be better. I try to be the best version of me. I pretend to be the me that God wants to see instead of the me that wants to just settle.

So, maybe pretending isn't such a bad thing. C. S. Lewis said in Mere Christianity that the best way to become holy is to act like someone who is holy. If we keep acting all the time, eventually the holy things will become habit and we will stop acting holy and actually be holy. So did he mean we should pretend to be holy? I think he did. However, the problem with pretending is when we stop pretending and go back to our sinful ways. I hope that someday I reach the point where holiness is a habit I've formed and I can stop pretending and be that way. Until then, I guess I'm back to pretending...